I feel inferior!

Every morning, in order to reach work, I have to walk up this bitch of a slope. It's a freaking steep long stretch of road. The first few days, I even get cramps in my calves from walking up it.I am not exaggerating.

Just earlier, when I was walking up, there was this other lady with me too. She was walking faster than me, so much faster, that when I tried so hard to catch up, my knees buckled (yeah yeah I am exaggerating). And I still cannot catch up with her.

I felt like a bum, not getting enough exercise, poor stamina and all.  To add insult to injury, she was wearing a blardy 3-inch heel!

Fight! Fight! Fight!

Something funny happened earlier, when I was on my way back from work. It happened on the bus, and no it didn't happen to me, luckily.

The bus I was on, was a bendy bus. In case some of you don't know what is a bendy bus, I'll draw it for you:

My illustration is not too bad huh? I think i should go major in design and not psychology, no wonder I can't find a job, cause my passion is in design. The wrong choices we make in life...... Yeah right, like you believe that I drew that.

Anyway, the bus made a stop at the Marsiling station, people got off, and for some reason the bus did not move. Actually I didn't realised that it wasn't moving, because I was in my other form, my bird form, killing alien green pigs. Then suddenly I heard a loud booming voice (okay la, exaggerated a little) saying "Move away from the door, don't stand there la, you block the sensor, the door cannot close", it was the bus driver, before I can turn around to see who he was talking to, I heard a heavily accented "什么屁啊".

Okay, to illustrate a little, this was what it was like in the bus (bird-eye view):

Now, this is my drawing. LOL. Anyway it's not really accurate, but just to give you an idea how far away I was from the action.

So back to the story. Yellow ball still did not budge, don't know if it is because he don't understand English or because he thought Purple ball was talking to someone else. If it was the latter, Yellow ball must be pretty dumb, cause no one else was standing near the door except him. So Brown ball repeated what the Purple ball said to Yellow ball, telling him the his bag's blocking the sensor, that's why the door cannot close. And all Yellow ball did was to move a couple of inches. Dumb ass. Anyway when the driver managed to close the door, Purple ball asked Brown ball "Don't understand ar?" then Brown ball replied "Ya la, he don't understand, china man what, all stupid". When Yellow ball heard the S-word, he raised his voice "What stupid? what stupid?". Then Brown ball said "People already tell already, ask don't block the sensor the door cannot close, you don't want move" And they just kept repeating that to each other, until Brown ball got pissed off and stood up, shouting in Yellow ball's face.

I missed part of the action because I find killing alien pigs more interesting. Only when I heard other people asking them to stop that I turned around again. Saw Brown ball clenching the front of Yellow ball's t-shirt, and a little shoving match went on. Yellow ball got pissed, and dramatically removed his specs, with an expression saying 'I'm gonna kick your arse". With that, he started fighting with Brown ball. Throwing punches and grabbing hair. And there were quite a few ladies standing at the standing area, and the women standing closes to them got hit in her arm. And she went like "Eh stop la, you hit me already" and she continued standing there. All I can say is, YOU DUMB BITCH. Seriously, just move away from them la, still stand so close for what. Like they can hear you in the heat of action, still wanna stand there to get hit again, then complain.

Of course, the 2 balls continued trying to out punch and out grab each other. Purple ball continued driving and only stopped when the bus reached the next stop (There's a rule that says you cannot stop your bus no matter what happens on your bus is it??), all the while keep telling the balls to stop fighting. Told you they won't hear already right, another dumb ass. And because the bus was moving, no one dared to step forward to pull them apart, scared of falling to their death.

Once the bus stopped, 2 uncles stepped forward to hold back Brown ball, so that means Brown ball was winning the struggle right? I did not realise because I was caught in a moment of awe. A couple of days ago, I was actually watching fights in Singapore buses on YouTube; and I kept thinking, how nice if my iPhone can take videos. Then again, they may be helping Brown ball cause Yellow ball was clenching a fistful of Brown ball's hair. Purple ball headed towards the 2 balls, and kept saying in Mandarin that if they don't stop, he will call the cops. They shove each other a bit more, and finally stopped, and Yellow ball, remembering his specs, put them back on and alighted. Oh ya, at the bus stop, this aunty was half way boarding the bus, when she saw the fight and exclaimed loudly "哇! 有人在打架!", and she continued standing there and watch. Oh and White ball, he is mysterious because he was wearing a mask. Not facial mask mask la, but the 'I don't want to spread germs to you' mask.

So that was the end to my bus drama experience. When I told John what happened, he asked "How come this kinda thing don't happen when I'm taking buses". All I can say is YOU BIG KPO.

Oh ya, about the bus being a bendy bus, has no relation at all. LOL

Excitement!

Can't wait for the iPad launch this Friday (23rd July). I'm looking to get the 16GB one, since I can't even fully utilize the 8GB I have for my iPhone. I'm actually contemplating between the iPad and iPhone 4, but am thinking since my netbook is giving me problem and I won't be using my iPhone much if I have an iPad (apart from using it to check mail, cause I mainly use my iPhone for the game apps), I'll go for the iPad. And with the iPad, I can actually watch movies and read ebooks, iPhone's screen is too damn small to do those in comfort without straining my eyes. I'm planning to get it for myself as an early birthday gift! Anyone wanna sponsor part of it? Hahahaha.. Yippie! Instead of this:

I'm gonna be getting this:

 

fastforwadpleasetyvm.

Lingerie.Hot Tub.Au Revoir.

Today's the last day to return my graduation gown, so die die had to drag myself out of the house to go return it, dragged John along of course.

Since we were near City Square Mall,(I have always wanted to go there, since I have not been there before) we headed there after we were done.

Was quite a disappointment, nothing much, except we saw a huge group of aunties and uncles doing line dancing outside. I can never learn how to appreciated line dancing, all I see is them moving back and forth and doing turns. How is that nice to watch?

Anyway, just when we were leaving City Square Mall, we passed by this lingerie (pronounced ling-ger-rie... no la just kidding) shop, and the first thing I saw was 3 Bangalas inside. It was a funny sight, and something I have never expected to see, cause the usual suspects in a lingerie boutique is women and the occasional men accompanying their wife/girlfriend/mistress.So it was quite an unexpected sight to see the 3 of them inside.

So I decided that the only reason they would be in there is to:

1) One of the guys wanted to get a sexy lingerie for his girlfriend but is too hum ji
    to go in alone, so he dragged his 2 poor friends along. He wanted some
    opinions on what to buy and so ask friend for advice.

2) One of the guys wanted to get a sexy lingerie for himself but is too hum ji
    to go in alone, so he dragged his 2 poor friends along. He wanted some
    opinions on what to buy and so ask friend for advice.

So which one do you think is more likely? Personally, my vote goes to the 2nd one... SO.... *suddenly change topic*

Headed to the Man Utd Cafe Bar, didn't know that today was the NE preview for the National Day, saw fireworks, had a fright cause I don't remember it being so loud, but then again it has been 13 years, so I might have fuzzy memories. So I asked John if it feels like that during war, with all the bombings around (as if he will know LOL).

Impromptu decision to catch a movie, so decided to watch 'Hot Tub Time Machine".

Tried to hang out at the cafe for longer than we planned to cause the earliest movie we could make it for is the 12am one, and it was only 8.30pm when we booked the tickets. By the time we left, I was feeling tired, told John that I regret booking the tickets when were were in the train (eyes were closing). Reached the cinema 1 hr early. Bought an extra box of popcorn for us to munch before the show starts to keep ourselves awake. The show was nice, I liked it, but then still feel that 'The Hangover' is better. It's mainly about this 3 guys who drifted apart over the years, got together after one of the guys attempted suicide. Decided to visit the place that they once had a good time, and ended up time-traveling to 20 years earlier. It's kinda like 'The Hangover' just in a different context.

While we were waiting for the movie to start, we were sitting at one of the tables at the food court beside the cinema, and watching trailers of upcoming movies. There was this Chinese film titled 'Au Revoir, Taipei'. Wasn't really interested in the content but rather the title. Cause I am curious how people are gonna pronounce the title. 'aw-re-vor'?? Maybe I should go apply at the part-time position with Cathay for like the first 3 days of the screening, just so that I can have a good laugh.

Au Revoir is French for Good-bye, pronounced 'o-vuwa'.

Anyway I'm gonna go shower and sleep, it's now 6.30am. Just came back from late supper with Merv and OneDee. Gotta ,make sure I have enough energy for the S-League match we are going to watch later, at Hougang stadium. Gonna be rooting for Sengkang FC which is at the bottom of the table!

iPad

I told John that I want an iPad for my birthday.

It's funny how I am the gadget crazy one and not John, stereotypically, John being the man should be the one who is super into these kinda geeky gadget stuff.

Anyway, the iPad is not out yet, though it should be out soon,before my birthday. So I told John that I want one. You know like how in this episode of Modern Family, where Claire manages to get Phil an iPad. I want that too!

And my dear John told me that he can get me one now! I was so happy, I even went to find a case for it (which will be part of the birthday present). So now I'm gonna share it with you guys what I will be getting from my generous boyfriend:

                                         

                                 

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Continue scrolling....

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Reaching them soon...

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 TADAH!!!!!

And here is the cute case

Aren't they sweet? Custom butterfly prints one the pad and a case covered in hearts and has lace trimmings too. Fit for a princess! Oh and not forgetting the nice big red bow!

To all the Lians & Bengs out there.

Following my Ah Lian Graduation photo, I feel that the L&Bs deserve me dedicating a post to them, for they are a unique breed, can only be found in Singapore (oh well, Malaysia too la, but who cares), so, we should be proud of them!

For the Lians and Bengs reading my blog, this is something to make reading my blog easier to understand, makes it Beng & Lian friendly: English to Benglish Translator

Anyway, they are always fun to talk about, whether you are one of them or not. Non-L&Bs talk about them, or rather make fun of their engrish; Lians and Bengs talk about other L&Bs, who is chio who is yandao, or who they see buay song.

Anyway I believe everyone must have had some L&B wannabe moments in their younger days (don't be paiseh to admit la), unless you are a geek la, then nothing to say. Those are good times to look back at, right John? Your Versace jeans, bell bottoms, pointy combs and long wallets before your hip hop days.

Here is an interesting fact I've found:
Ah Lian vs. Ah Huay
Ah Huay is actually a class lower than Ah Lian, normally Ah Lian is the one that dresses better. Didn't know they have different class too. Impressive.
Ah Beng vs Ah Seng
Ah Seng = lao beng

Maybe I should organise a L&B themed party for my birthday, so I shall give you some tips on dressing like a Lian or Beng:

Apart from dressing like one, you will need to know how to speak in their lingo, apart from all the vulgarities.

Abuden ( equivalent to the English word: And then? Or Ah, but then? )
Ali Baba ( equivalent to cheat/steal)
Wahseh ( a.k.a Aiseh ) ( equivalent to expression of surprise)
Action ( equivalent to being proud or cocky) Eg “ Waseh buy new phone ah? Action oledi lah! “
Walau eh !( equivalent to an expression of total disbelief ) Eg. “ Walau eh, that charbo( girl) neh neh very big lah! “

Aiya, akcherly to talk like beng and lian sibei easy one la, just talk like you buay song or want to xio pah can orlady, and hor make sure each sentence got vowgality tio eh sai liao.



Gonna end this post with some jokes:


Story 1:
In a shop one day..
Ah Lian: Eh Ah Chek, you got sell stocking up to knee, boh?
Ah Chek : Lyou siao ah! Stocking wear up to ‘yeo’ (waist) only, where got up to the ‘nee’ (breast) one.

Story 2:
Ah Beng bought a Honda VTI recently and drove to Ah Lian’s place to show it to her. So there Ah Beng was bragging the various functions of his new car to his girlfriend.
Ah Beng: This is ah, so fast even the Mata Chia cannot catch ah!
Ah Lian: Ha! Really ah!!! Steady lah!

Ah Beng: Some more hor, this is Automatic one, vely easy to drive!
Ah Lian: Let me try! I wan, I wan!!

So Ah Lian took the driver’s seat and shifted the gear and floored the accelerator.
The next moment, the car sped backwards and crashed into the lamp-post.

Ah Beng: Alamak! What you doing? YOU Siao Char Bo! YOU see lah! Wah Piang eh!
Ah Lian: Solee, solee, pai sah lah! No lah, I thought hor, R for racing mah!

Story 3:
Once upon a time, a group of Ah Bengs stepped into a lounge and wanted the DJ to play the song “Ah Cheng Buey Ro Ti” (In Hokkien means Ah Cheng buys Bread)

The DJ told them that they only have English songs and told them to re-select another song. The Ah Bengs were very angry and kicked up a big fuss, claiming the DJ was insulting them. The manager had to intervene in order to calm them down.

Finally, after long talk with Ah Bengs, the manager found out that Ah Bengs actually asking for the song “Unchained Melody” by the Righteous Brothers.

Story 4:
One day, two Ah Lians got into a lift from the 20th storey and want to get down to the ground floor. As they looked at the dial, they could see the number 20 down to number 2. It was then followed by a G. As they not English-educated, they were puzzled and had no idea what does the letter G mean.

Suddenly one of them exclaimed excitedly and hit G. When they finally reached the ground floor, the other Ah Lian was so impressed and asked the first Ah Lian, “Wah lau!!!, how you know one?” The first Ah Lian reply smugly, “Easy lah.. G for Gero mah…”

What our sons will be like at 18...

Singapore Engrish

This is really funny. Was waiting for the new girl to come, so I was blog surfing.

Was at Kenny Sia's blog and saw one of his categories: Engrish. Went to check it out, and had a really good laugh.

Check it out: Singapore Engrish

My Big Day!

After so long, I've finally graduated, officially.

Commencement was on the 9th.

Didn't manage to take much photo in the hall, cause I left my camera with my mum, and smartly left my bag (with my phone) with her too.

We had to wait for the ceremony to begin, since I don't have any camera to snap, I flipped through the program, and I saw this:

It's nothing much actually, cause the names of all the graduates were listed inside. But seeing it printed in something like that, made me feel important haha.

"Cum Laude" is the name of the Latin Honors I got, it's suppose to be pronounced as "coom lau-day" but I prefer to call it cum 'lau-der". Sounds sexual, I like.

This guy, he's the CEO of SIM, who has problem pronouncing simple words properly, words like program sounded like "poh-gram". At least it's some respite from his very very dull speech.

The Master of Ceremonies was not any much better, he made "congratulation" sound like a foreign word. I know I'm mean, but that's what I do to keep myself awake when I'm being put to sleep by long speeches.

By leaving my camera with my mum, I was hoping that she can capture me on stage, since I won't be able to see myself, and this is what she gave me:

The first 2 are of people I don't know, the 3rd one is my friend Grace, who went up on stage right before me, and then there's me. Cute. She said she did not realise the order of the presentation, and when she manage to find my name in the program, they were already onto the Masters.

After about 3 long torturous hours, we were finally done. Will update again when I get the proper individual shot and group shot when I return the grad gown. Hopefully I look better in those then what mum gave me.

After we were done, hung around to take come photos with May and Shu Yee. Photos are with them though, and some more with Grace, shall update this post soon.

Headed to the atrium for the buffet and went to take some more photos.

Really couldn't take it anymore, and went to change out of the gown.

Despicable Me

Went to catch Despicable Me with John earlier, in 3D! I really enjoy movies in 3D, the whole experience is so much better when it's in 3D. Ever since Avatar, we try to catch movies in 3D whenever possible.

It was actually a last minute decision, we initially we planning to watch Toy Story 3 instead, but I think it has been up for quite awhile now, so there is only one timing for it, with only the first few rows left.

I heard that Desipicable Me is funny, and anyway we like Steve Carell (40 year old virgin), so we decided to go for this instead, without even knowing what it is about.

It turned out to be pretty good, it's a really cute movie. Steve Carell voiced Gru, the main lead in the animation. He is like the good bad guy, and the 3 children he adopted changed him. Shall not divulge too much in case some of you decided to catch it.

Agnes is the youngest of the 3 girls and she is really adorable. She is the one that softened Gru.

Gru and Agnes.

The funniest and cutest will be the minions that work for Gru.

The part that I enjoyed most is when they were on this rollcoaster ride. Because it's in 3D, it feels like you are on the ride itself. Nice =D

Officer Crabtree...

John's watching 'Allo 'Allo beside me. It's so noisy and distracting that I just had to check it out. So I asked him for a rundown on the sitcom.

Basically, 'Allo 'Allo is set in France during WWII, where all the characters speak French (expect it's in English) get what I mean? The actors speaks with a French accent (so it's kinda like the whole 'French' sitcom is being dubbed in English). The main character, René Artois owns a café, where the German soldiers frequent and threatened him into helping them. On the other side, the French Resistance is using his café as a safe house. And all he wanted is to be no part of all these. So this sitcom is about him playing both sides of the fence and his string of affairs with his waitresses.

The one I really like is this character who's called Officer Crabtree. He speaks very bad french, which naturally translates into very bad English, and it is hilarious.

For instance,

Good Morning will sound like "Good Meu-ning"
They have scored a direct hit on the pipes = They have scored a direct hot on the pimps

There are times where you really cannot make out what he is trying to say, I will have to keep replaying certain parts to try and figure out what he's trying to say, and still not get it. LOL.Try out the video below and see how much of what he said can you catch.

Poodle and Kittens

I was in the room with John and Heidi, when we heard "meowings".  Don't know why, but when I think cat, the color gray comes into my mind, maybe I'd watched too much Tom and Jerry when I was young.

I miss watching Tom & Jerry, I was always so excited whenever I hear the T&J tune when I was young, I can still remember the lyrics

"Its the Tom and Jerry kids, gotta be there where all the action is... Tom and Jerry Kids, Tom and Jerry Kids new show!"

Anyway, back to the meowings, I asked John if a cat ran into the house, then he said might be Kent's friend's ringtone. Which I initially thought might be too, but the meowings just wouldn't stop and it's like kinda loud.

Opened the door, saw no cats, stepped out of room, went to Kent's room, thinking that there's a stupid cat outside his window, cause a couple of days ago, he said the neighbours and a cat created a ruckus (the cat attacking them or something). Turn out his friend brought over these 2 kittens, which are like round 2 weeks old, cause she wants Kent to help her find some foster parents for them. Her friend found them abandoned outside the supermarket she was working at.

They were very small! Totally not what I expected, though I hate cats, but the brown one was kinda cute (there's another one that was black, can see nothing expect black, so I didn't really bother with it). Heidi started going crazy, walking around the room, whining and panting really hard, tried to get close to the cage, but was too 'hum-ji'. Took a small step forward and a few steps back. Tried to stretch as much as she can to check them out without being too close, it was really cute actually.

We did not know what she wanted, and she just would not stop whining, and kept trying to check them out. Cause the kittens were still meowing, we thought that maybe it was her maternal instincts to want to rescue them from the cage and protect them. But then again, she was too scared to be wanting to do that, so John was saying that maybe she thought that they were squeaky toys therefore wanted to get to them. This felt was more plausible.

Anyway they took them out, and tried to see what Heidi will do to them, she did nothing more that sniffing and licking them. Kent was suggesting them she is being harmless since she was only licking, but John said that she might just be checking to see if they are tasty.

Anyway we saw her trying to bite the brown kitten when it reached out it's paws to try to touch Heidi. After that I just held on to Heidi, though I had to make quite an effort to hold her back.

Till now, Heidi would not stop whining, Kent's friend has been for like close to 2 hours now... Damn do I hate cats. Only exception:

I feel so old! I bet kids now don't even know who is Felix the Cat.

She sneaked into Kent's room to check out the kittens -_- Got caught.

Revamped!

The more I looked at my old blog skin, the uglier I found it.. So I've decided to revamp my blog.. It's looking so much better now!

Oh! I've replaced the youtube vids that I had with MixPod (thanks to Jess), which is so much better, cause they have all the songs that I want, and it auto plays! I know not all might like this though, cause not everyone enjoys the same kinda music, and I know how annoying it gets when you have to find the player and stop the music... But you are at my blog,so you have to listen to what I listen *grin*

Okay la, I shall not be so mean. Let me know if you guys want me to turn off the auto-play feature and I will do it =)

*YES! Snap Barf is finally perfect!*

Head-turning 'beauty'!!!

I cannot believe my luck! I wanted so bad to take a photo to show you guys but I just cannot find the chance to, cause she thought that she is so damn hot, kept turning and looking around to see if anyone is looking at her.

Anyway I'm gonna show you what I saw as best as I can, the cyan & grey stripy thingy's the shorts she was wearing (I just cannot seem to remember what top she was wearing). The grey lines are her ass cheeks. Yup gross ass cheeks, comes with free cellulite! What a deal!

A head-turner indeed, though for the wrong reason.